Ex-son: Mom, have you gained weight?
Me: Why yes I did. In fact I gained SIX POUNDS OVER MY BIRTHDAY WEEKEND living on cake and wine. Thank you for noticing, I love you, do I look like I've gained weight?
Ex-son: Yes but now you're even more cuddly!
He's a spinner, that 8 year old.
Sorry, Parents: Nobody Wants the Family "Heirlooms"
12 hours ago