Honestly, I swear there is a big black hole residing in the small space reserved for brain matter in the noggin of a teenager. Words leave my mouth, travel in through his ears and then get sucked back into the void so fast I'm reeling!

Stephen Hawking should put his theories on the possibility of extra terrestrial life forms aside and address the potential impact of all the black holes hanging out in front of my house right now. My fear is you get enough of them together, the entire universe as we know it could be jeopardized!

Yesterday's conversation with changing teen brain:

CTB: Mom, can I invite about 8 friends over to the house?

Me: Okay, let me think ... NO.

CTB: Why not?!

Me: Because I'm at work and I'm not having 8+ boys in the house unsupervised.

CTB: But we're just going to hang out at the front of the house or the back of the house.

This makes no sense to me.

Me: No.

CTB: Fine.

I call later to find a PARTY going on at 10:30 in the morning.

Me: How many kids are in the house?

CTB: Maybe 5.

Me: How many kids did I say could be in the house?

CTB: 5?

Me: No ZERO! Honestly, how did he manage to get 95% in math?

CTB: But I'm just feeding them.

The thought of feeding 5 13-14 year old boys has me faint on the keyboard. There will be no food left in the house. The door to the refrigerator will be be unhinged. If the big galoot is there, chances are catfood will be consumed and the fish will be gone.

So because I have spies on the street I later find out that there were 5 boys plus 3 girls, one wearing a flag. Thankfully the fish was fine.

And I will be encouraging a summer of paintball and xbox.